I often use my nails as the signal of time passing - oh! It’s time to cut them again?
Without the structure of semesters, long since past, and living without seasons my sense of time is lost. Whereas my peers seem to have those small people running around, always getting bigger as a reminder, I do not and my companions have a wide range of ages.
I’ve taken to asking people how old they think I am, just to see. They always guess younger and I reply with 42! (I’m 33) so that people will be surprised at how well I’ve taken care of myself.
I saw something on the internet that said, “If I live to be 110, I’m going to tell people that I drank a can of Sprite every day,” or I moisturized with Salt from the Dead Sea, which I imported every year. Once Alec Baldwin asked Pete Davidson how he stayed so fit. Pete replied with, “one hundred sit-ups a day, man,” because he didn’t want to tell him that’s just what being 22 looked like. Alec did the sit-ups and is now a fit man. Pete’s girlfriend, Kim, said she would rub poop on her face every day to stay young - how is this less reasonable than snail secretions?
When I consider the passage of time, I can only see the day before and get a glimpse into the day after, not much change at all.
I had a friend who read horoscopes in the newspaper with me once. He said, “how can you deal with this much change every day!” and that’s when I stopped reading my horoscope daily. Monthly is much more reasonable, you see.
When I pull tarot cards, I always ask the same question, “What’s happening today, my friend?” And I get the reply I asked for.
Yesterday I purchased child’s bed sheets because they fit the bed I’m sleeping on and they have sunshines with faces, which, without reason, makes me happy when I wake up. I know this would look weird to an outsider, so in exchange I’ve agreed to have no one over. It’s like having a bad tattoo, you hope the person that sees it knows you first to understand that’s not the totality, just a piece of the puzzle. When in doubt, always get the bad tattoo.